Clients from Hell


hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#1
You may or may not no of such a site https://clientsfromhell.net/post/43667203957/we-think-it-would-be-better-to-stick-with-darker
(example)

Thought we could start our own.


Dear Hank

Can you please create a business card for <Name> and send it on to me?

> Yes of course that's no problem at all, do you have details for his card?

No, can you just make it up and send it back to me...?

> No problem, would you like to leave phone/fax/mobile numbers blank and fill them in later or would you like to get <Name>'s details and send them on.

Just get it done.

> Sigh.
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#3
Ha another one today

Getting email confirmation for some stationery.

>: If you can please sign off on the <5> items for your stationery I can move it into production

>: I'm not sure if these will be ok for our current templates

(fair enough - they have templates setup in Word to overprint on the documents>

>: No problem - I can send you a sample of the item if you want?

>: Yes samples would be great.

>: No problem - can you confirm if you want all <5> or would you like to see <1>,<2>,<3>, <4> or <5>? I can send samples of anything you like.

At some point I get an email from this online secure emailing system that they started using all of a sudden - requires me to login, plus I can't keep a record of the emails now as they expire after 30 days.

>: Please send samples of item <1>

>: Are these all signed off, do you only need samples of <1>

>: Ok, can you send samples of <1,2,3>

>: No problem are these signed off?

>: Yes



I proceeded with samples of <1-3> but now holding off on <4,5> as there is no clear sign off.

That's the short version of the email conversation - there's about 50 emails in regards to this :(

It's being on since 9am and it's now 4:45pm!

Sigh.
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#4
Designing a prescription pad for a doctors office.


"We feel the quote of £50 is expensive for prescription pads"
.
..
...
*thought bubble* I feel going to the doctors for an appointment and waiting 40 minutes to be seen and talk to the doctor for 5 minutes and charged £50 is daylight robbery.*end thought bubble*
...
..
.
"£50 is minimum charge - there's nothing we can do on price"


To put things into perspective - £50 for a pad of 50 prescription leafs - this generates £2500 for the doctor.
 
scotty

scotty

Moderator
Staff member
#5
Designing a prescription pad for a doctors office.


"We feel the quote of £50 is expensive for prescription pads"
.
..
...
*thought bubble* I feel going to the doctors for an appointment and waiting 40 minutes to be seen and talk to the doctor for 5 minutes and charged £50 is daylight robbery.*end thought bubble*
...
..
.
"£50 is minimum charge - there's nothing we can do on price"


To put things into perspective - £50 for a pad of 50 prescription leafs - this generates £2500 for the doctor.

They only want one pad?
 
Stationery Direct

Stationery Direct

Administrator
Staff member
#6
"We feel the quote of £50 is expensive for prescription pads"
The amount of Solicitors we deal with that try to haggle over price amazes me, imagine trying to knock them down on their £200 per hour rate!! Also large accountancy firms (who must understand cash flow of small businesses) that take literally months to pay their bill, despite chasing 5 or 6 times!!
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#8
The amount of Solicitors we deal with that try to haggle over price amazes me, imagine trying to knock them down on their £200 per hour rate!! Also large accountancy firms (who must understand cash flow of small businesses) that take literally months to pay their bill, despite chasing 5 or 6 times!!
It might be a reason the rich get richer and I get poorer!
 
scotty

scotty

Moderator
Staff member
#9
Actually, I've noticed that GP's don't seem to have as much money as they used to.
When I was a kid my Doctor used to be puffing away on a cigarette with a full ash tray on his desk and he'd give me a lolly after a visit.

None of that these days.
They're writing a prescription out before you've sat down.

I feel for them.....I really do. :(
 
bigdave

bigdave

Moderator
Staff member
#10
We've got a client who spent 4 months changing their mind and then questioning the bits of the proposal theyd just changed.. 3 weeks after signing the agreement they'd given no feedback on wireframes or concepts. Yesterday they emailed to ask why the site's not live yet!?
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#11
Ah painful man! That's awful. I know how you feel.

Got one at the moment - started desiging last July (2017) [it's now 2018] and the event is on Friday, and they need to sign off by 2pm - and I'm on proof version 19.

Just keep making changes ...
 
scotty

scotty

Moderator
Staff member
#12
I've had plenty of Employers From Hell but most of my clients are pretty well behaved at the moment.

I do hate 'design by committee' though and I've had plenty of those in the past.
These tend to be connected to local councils for some reason that completely escapes me.
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#13
At a clients office. I had sent files via WeTransfer and he couldn't download them, so I offered to drop by. I went into the office and started the download for him. Minimised the window and said, now they're downloading there, and you can view them once they download.

"But now I can't use the internet!!!"
"Why?"
"Because you're using it to download HUGE FILES!!!"

I opened a new browser window for him and he was like
"OH I didn't know you could do that. I thought if you were using the internet I couldn't use it"

*facepalm*

He also emailed me a file the other day and it just said "Send this back"
I opened the file, no changes to be made, I rang him
"What do you want me do with this file?"
"Nothing, just email it back to me, I don't have it on file and if you email it back to me I can then have it on file"
"But you emailed the file to me...." - "Never mind, I've sent it back to you".
 
DarenGR1

DarenGR1

New Member
#14
He also emailed me a file the other day and it just said "Send this back"
I opened the file, no changes to be made, I rang him
"What do you want me do with this file?"
"Nothing, just email it back to me, I don't have it on file and if you email it back to me I can then have it on file"
"But you emailed the file to me...." - "Never mind, I've sent it back to you".

lol lol lol !))) It's so "beautiful!"
 
hankscorpio

hankscorpio

Moderator
Staff member
#15
Had an outstanding bill for 2 business cards for a client. Hadn't heard anything in a couple of weeks, so got in touch with an invoice for the typesetting work.

Invoice was £25.

Got a lovely email from the client which ended with:

"Send me a bill? How dare you!"

Leave it to your imagination as to the rest of the email.
 
Jimlad

Jimlad

Well-Known Member
#16
I used to have a client who would send me 4 or 5 emails in the middle of the night. I'd read them the next morning and they'd basically depict his chaotic train of thought, each contradicting the last. One gem ended with:

"...no background colour, and can you make the characters transparent?"

So... you want nothing then. Clever. #facepalm
 
bigdave

bigdave

Moderator
Staff member
#17
Ive got one at the moment who needed a site building in a a matter of days. I built the site, pushed it live and sent the invoice.

after 2 weeks they'd not settled the invoice so I sent them an email and was told their accounts dept take 14 working days to process invoices. A further 2 weeks have passed and still no payment just excuses. payment is now promised by friday. If its not landed by 5pm the site's coming down and we'll see how quickly they respond then.
 
Paul Murray

Paul Murray

Moderator
Staff member
#18
Not a personal client from hell, but thought this was worth sharing here. This is a job I found posted on a freelancing job site yesterday. The expectations are hilarious, especially for the cost (plus the site takes 20% of the fee for a job too).

Clients from Hell, , Graphic Design Forum:

What they want for $75 (roughly £45 after fees and conversion):
  • High quality for online + video usage
  • Multiple version of the logo in different colourways, sizes and formats
  • Full copyright and IP transfer
  • Social media profile versions and cover images
  • Web banners (no more info provided)
  • Business card designs
  • Unlimited revisions
  • Extra additions (aka feature creep) AT NO EXTRA COST
  • Bonus pay if you do everything AND they love it
  • Future work and recommendations if you're quick… gotta love getting that exposure!
Re-reading this just made me die a little inside, because I know there'll be people out there, probably in less-developed countries, who will be fighting for the job. I'm cool with them getting paid, but I don't think anyone with this much impertinence should get what they ask for, especially at that cost.
 
Jimlad

Jimlad

Well-Known Member
#19
That's Upwork for you.

My last client there asked me to draw a frog character. Once I got the job, he told me he actually wanted a DIFFERENT frog character done first. In a specific pose and style. In several poses actually. Oh and can you make it look like this? And can you do this style but this pose? Oh and we need another one, it's urgent cos we have a meeting in 2 hours. We will pay bonus, we will pay bonus.

Oh, and can you draw this one in your style?... wait... I recognise that pose. I DREW THAT. So you took MY artwork, got someone else to draw it again, and now you want me to draw it again? Hang on, WHAT? How many artists do you have working on this copying off each other???

(Months later)

Hey we need one more pose.
*Upwork app deleted.*
 
Paul Murray

Paul Murray

Moderator
Staff member
#20
Yep, I've never even bothered using these sorts of sites, prices are too low and competition is too high. They make you jump through so many hoops too. PPH actually want you to upload documentation to prove you have the skills you've listed on your profile before you can even pitch for work. It never used to be like that, though you could probably just fake it quite easily given some of the work I've seen on there.

I keep an eye out because once in a while you'll see a job that actually looks like a pretty worthwhile, but they're few and far between. Certain sectors that aren't so saturated seem to do much better than most design-related fields.
 
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