Haven't much clue, to tell the truth, but I've always enjoyed playing around with Flash, and the wife is currently on a course and about to enter its Flash fortnight. Based on past experiences of the kind, that means
a) my learning curve will rise more or less in parallel to hers, as she repeats "I don't understand this" (or that) and I have to explain it to her, and
b) she will have access to a professional designer with Flash expertise who is teaching (at which he will be frankly lousy) as a sideline and who will always be delighted to show off his knowledgeability.
So ask away.
(Love the Quiller-Couch* quote, by the way, and I think you're right - Q.C was referring to how hard and how necessary it is for a writer sometimes to delete the prose of which he is most proud, and it's a sacrifice all communicators, from writers to designers, web programmers,or film makers have to make on occasion.)
* I am in fact the proud owner of twin 1920 editions of "The Art of Reading" and "The Art of Writing." This is completely irrelevant and off-topic, but I've been wanting to boast about it for years and never found the opportunity, and, shoot, as they say: if you've got it, flaunt it. My apologies to those of you who have no idea what I am talking about.