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Two blokes driving down a country lane when an old fella on a tractor comes past shouting "THE END IS NEIGH! THE END IS NEIGH!" One bloke looks at the other and says "What the..." to which the other bloke says "That'll be farmer Geddon"
George Michael has publicly declared his sympathy for the captain of the Costa Concordia. He says he can understand how he feels as he often wakes up on his side, confused and surrounded by dead seamen.