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static design mock up..needing critique

Discussion in 'Website Design Critique:' started by susan maher, Apr 11, 2017.

  1. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    this is my second attempt at a website...lots to learn...
    Brief:
    The Bag Lady.com.au is the clients registered domain - Client: John Simpson - sells handmade bags to a boutique market.
    There is no shop front as bags are sold all over Sydney at weekend markets.

    He says the average buyer is female, probably between 30 and 50 years. The business doesn’t have any existing web presence at all. John has decided it is time to increase his market share and get the word out. He would like to attract people in their 20s and get them to come to the markets and seek out the bags. He would like to push the fact that each bag is unique and handmade.
    _______________________________________________________________

    'read more' and 'gallery' on this static design indicated hyperlinks.



    my questions:

    1-is it visually appealing to the target audience of young people in their 20’s -

    2-does it encourage people to visit the markets -

    3-Is navigation clear, and logical -

    4-Is content appropriate for this client brief .-

    5-is it credible that bags are handmade –

    6-Have I omitted anything that you feel should be included-

    7-is interactivity – maps and photo gallery enough for this client in your opinion-

    8- is there anything that looks like it doesn’t belong or is out of place-

    9- is choice of font okay-

    10-Any suggestions for improvement-
     

    Attached Files:

  2. Levi

    Levi Moderator Staff Member

    Can you upload a jpeg, I don't open pdf's from unknown sources due to the potential for scripts to be included in pdfs.
     
  3. wac

    wac Senior Member

    1) No, you've used Comic Sans, so it's only appealing to toddlers and teachers designing a poster for a school fete.
    2) Yes, the call to action of visiting the market is clear.
    3) Yes, it would be difficult to make the navigation any clearer.
    4) Yes, the subject of the text and the pictures of the bags a pertinent.
    5) Irrelevant how the bags are made at this point. The quality of the product will be judged largely by the medium in which it's being showcased, ie, the website.
    6) Yes, prices.
    7) Not essential to begin with, but selling them online should definitely be considered at some juncture.
    8) Why is there a silhouette of a loaf of bread saying 'visit us at Bondi markets'?
    9) See response 1

    10) Honestly, we all have to start somewhere with design and while your mockup lacks visual quality it should be given credit for its simplicity and usability. That being said, sometimes no website is better than a website that doesn't match the quality of the product or service being sold. There is significant room for improvement necessary but stick with it.

    Bonus Note) Capitalising the word Cork make it look like the bags were made in Cork, Ireland, not made from cork the material.
     
  4. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    Yay...Thanks for response. Yes I balked at using Comic sans but read a review somewhere of an example of a good website and they used it...but should have stuck to some principles.

    I can def change the loaf of bread. It happened accidentally ..and I left it for dramatic effect ( haha)

    Yes Cork Ireland...kept coming to my mind too. Very hard to make it look even attractive. Everyone else went for leather . Maybe I should do the same but I didnt want to cos it just didnt look handmade.

    Thanks for all the tips..I really appreciate it.

    @ Levi I will upload jpeg after I fix type and loaf of bread...
     
  5. hankscorpio

    hankscorpio Moderator Staff Member

    The opening post reads like the description of an assignment in college.

    Is this what this is? Just to be clear.
     
  6. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    Yes it is. I probably shouldn't post here as everyone here is at the top of the game. I always get ripped to shreds but it usually makes me come up with something better, ( that is as much as a beginner can.)
    Anyway ..gonna scrap this design and start again :)
    I will try not to post here until I am more skilled.
     
  7. wac

    wac Senior Member

    Stick with it and don't refrain from asking for feedback, even if it can be a little demoralising!

    Don't worry about not being more skilled, Levi has been posting here for years ;)
     
  8. hankscorpio

    hankscorpio Moderator Staff Member

    I appreciate your efforts. But it's an assignment for college - therefore you should be working with your tutors on this.

    Any forums is rarely a good place to get feedback on school projects.

    Work with classmates, tutors and your peers to reach the goals mentioned in your post.
     
  9. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    There is very little support there.
    I have to rely on the goodwill of others and beg a bit.
    Tutor situation is not great and fellow students are at my level.
    There are no forums really to help beginners. We are too 'cringe inducing'...but I will keep plugging away. :)
     
  10. hankscorpio

    hankscorpio Moderator Staff Member

    Yes - but it is your homework - not ours.

    If your tutors are lacking and support is not there then I'm more concerned about the course and college than anything else.

    You're not cringe inducing and nobody said that. I encourage you to seek help from your peers at the course.
     
  11. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    Its not really homework Hankscorpio :) The assessors make us seek feedback from external sources . And what's the point in asking family when they think anything and everything is amazing.:mad:
    Regarding peers on the course. No one has responded. Its been 3 x days. The course, being online is Asynchronised so we are all at different stages.

    Thanks for the encouragement Wac...I seriously do better after a visit here. And Hank you helped me heaps the last time !

    This is what I'll be submitting. I scrapped the cork metaphor as I dont think anyone realised the pattern was of a cork texture and it was ghastly. I got rid of the loaf of bread and pondered deeply about the bias designers have towards comic sans. Wish I could find the website that promoted it as I since learned there are jokes about it.
    This is a ver y simple website but difficult because I am dealing with market stalls and a guy ( hypothetical) who wants to lure young girls to the markets ( hmmm). There is no point in doing magazine style high end designer bags for this client in my opinion ( not that I have the skills anyway ) and also I have no photos of my own to work with- all in all v difficult. Slide1.PNG
     
  12. hankscorpio

    hankscorpio Moderator Staff Member

    If you like it then go with it.
     
  13. Levi

    Levi Moderator Staff Member

    Feedback... I'll just type it as I see it so I'm just judging the work etc as usual. Feedback may be harsh at times but you need a thick skin in design so you might as well start building it up early..pro tip, never take criticism of your work personally, just use it to make something better :)

    Huge header area, the whole website design looks very narrow so if it's scaled up to 1920x1080 screen (a pretty common size these days) it will either be very narrow or you lose most of the top part of the design.

    Menu and logo seem excessively large and I don't understand the background image choice (and the curved cut is really rough)

    Overall design seems to use dated design approach rather than looking at current design trends such as responsive mobile first design.

    Seems to focus more on the header/menu/logo and background image than the product they're trying to sell

    Text is poorly placed as it overlaps background image on right.

    Design could really do with some 'white space' to help it breath etc.

    Now you say he wants to draw clients to a market stall, depending on the type of stall it can be seen as quite boho-chic to buy from that sort of location so rather than trying to make a company seem up market sometimes you need to play to it strengths and make it feel more personalised or maybe head towards the 'boutique' vibe.

    Honestly I'd say you'd benefit from going somewhere like awwwards and looking at current designs for inspiration and then see what you can come up with after that.
     
  14. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    Thanks a lot..
    delighted to get responses :)

    Background is of market stalls.
    logo is large cos its my own design :)
    I will adjust the width
    I avoided focusing on the product cos I have no good images of handmade bags . They all look dreadful unless they are high end like gucci etc...
    I have adjusted the placing of text already.
    Good advice to play to the strengths and make it personalised..but i guess the whole thing is odd 'cos I doubt any market stall holder would want a website or any kind of interactivity. They are not really main stream as a rule.
    but again Thank You. I really appreciate it.
     
  15. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    upload_2017-4-14_6-27-37.png upload_2017-4-14_6-28-29.png

    LHS- I got rid of my girl and created belt instead. No jagged edges. Clean and legible.
    RHS _ My favourite, but need to change italic type and heading for purposes of legibility.
    Getting there...
     
  16. susan maher

    susan maher Member

    upload_2017-4-14_7-5-29.png


    This is the one for me. Thanks for pointing me to the website' awwards'...v inspirational. I haven't the resources to do what they do, but I have improved on this design at least. :)
     

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