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BAD HUMOR - Actual Newspaper Headlines

Discussion in 'Chill Out Forum:' started by Ozwaldo Sanchez, Oct 6, 2009.

  1. The following are actual headlines from real newspapers around the planet ... Some of the headlines are a few years old. Enjoy!

    1. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
    [No, really? Nothing gets by these folks!]

    2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
    [Now THAT's taking things a bit far!]

    3. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
    [What a guy!]

    4.Miners Refuse to Work after Death
    [No-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!]

    5. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
    [See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

    6. War Dims Hope for Peace
    [I can see where it might have that effect!]

    7. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
    [You think?]

    8. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
    [Who would have thought it!]

    9. Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide. [Hmm ... They may be on to something!]

    10. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
    [You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? Say it ain't so!]

    11. Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
    [He probably IS the battery charge!]

    12. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
    [Wasn't the original group fat enough?]

    13. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
    [Note to self: Never go 'south of the border' before a launch!]

    14. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
    [Taste like chicken, I hear.]

    15. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
    [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

    16. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
    [Boy, are they tall!]

    17. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
    [And they call THAT news!?]
     
  2. suzy@cystem

    suzy@cystem Guest

    Lol!! Well that livened up my lunch hour!! :eek:)
     
  3. Stationery Direct

    Stationery Direct Administrator Staff Member

    Very good :icon_biggrin:
     
  4. SparkCreative

    SparkCreative Member

    Tres amusant.
     

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