GF Smith stock can very expensive, and they are reluctant to give swatches out to all and sundry. I don't have a problem getting them, but even I won't give them out to all and sundry, because when I need one I want them to supply one. Have you tried asking for an A4 sheet or two of a specific stock.
With regard to printing onto said stock, and printer worth their salts will do a wet proof for you but it will cost. Some of the GF Smith stocks are available with sample images and finishes printed on them. I can't say much about AW since I haven't dealt with them for a number of years.
With regarding to a website not having an option to choose stock I can only think you're referring to one of the slew of printers out there that run multiple jobs at the same time (printing.com/vista/qi), and they won't give you the option since they need you to run on a limited range of stock to make money. In context you aren't paying full setup costs.
A traditional printer though will do whatever you pay them to but it will cost more than you are used to.
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